My soul. My demise.
By Abu Khattab

Who is it that will hold my hand,
And guide me on a Day when the swarms shall come?
Who is it that will come and make an excuse for me,
When my book is dropped in my shaking left palm?

What shall be asked to a man of corruption,
After being forgiven he returned to the deed?
On a Day when the accounts shall be brought forth and clear, Happiness shall come only to those who are freed.

Shall I not be asked about the chances I had,
To prepare for my account before I faced my death?
But a loser I am for indeed I procrastinated,
Until finally I had taken my pathetic last breath.

Will it be that I shall drown in my demise,
While others enter through the gates of the garden?
Woe to me who has forgotten His Lord,
Woe to me – will I gain my Lord’s pardon?

What shall I say when He informs me of sins,
Instead of the good that I thought was surely sincere? But to dust they are, my intention was for others, The reality of my account striking me like a spear.

Deed after deed begins to evaporate,
From a watery ocean to a puddle that’s dried.
The ones who I once called my true best friends,
Have sold me out as to their Lord they cried.

“We are free from what he has committed in vain,
So free us O Lord from the chambers of strife!
Free us O Lord and have mercy on us!
For indeed we regret what we did in our life!”

Alas, my account has been dropped in my left,
Alas, my destination is what I thought was away.
Alas, my tears have now become blood,
Woe to me – for my sins I’ll pay.

You ask me my Lord about the deeds of my hands,
Was I not shy to turn away from this trade?
In the darkness I committed that which I was ashamed to show, To the people around, but from You I wasn’t afraid.

But my heart had swayed and it knew the truth,
But my arrogance grew to ask from You.
To ask You for forgiveness for what I had done,
But woe to me! If only I knew.

So my Lord I have hope in your infinite mercy,
That You may see good in what remains of my deed.
The one that remains that was surely sincere,
At a time when faith from my heart would bleed.

So do as You please with my sunken soul,
For indeed I have earned what awaits for me.
O Nafs Al-Amara you have sent me away,
To that which I thought I would never see…

What if as i move, every step of mine is closer to death than i thought, will my years past lived take me home to rest?

What if i go now, just like many that left yesterday and today. Will my soul be missed?.

May the Almighty God have mercy on us and forgive our numerous sins. AMIN

Leave your thoughts pls,